Hudson Valley Parent

HVP October 2016

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Page 36 of 39 n Hudson Valley Parent 37 27: Thursday Nursing Mother's Circle. Support group designed to help with common breastfeeding concerns. 1-2pm. Waddle n Swaddle Poughkeep- sie Location. 32 Raymond Ave, Poughkeepsie. 240-8399. 28: Friday Growing Together. Fun group learning activities, play and socialization for kids. Fridays, 10am- 12pm. North East Community Center. 51 South Center St, Millerton. 518-789-4259. Preschool Story Fun and Craft Time. Join us as we explore stories, finger plays, songs, activities and playtime. 1:30pm. Highland Public Library. 30 Church St, Highland. 691-2275 ext. 16. Story Hour 5-8 yr olds. Join us for crafts, songs, and games. 4-5:30pm. Town of Esopus Library. 128 Canal St., Port Ewen. 338-558. 29: Saturday "I Spy" Halloween Trail. Come find all the ob- jects cleverly hidden along the "I Spy" Halloween Trail. 12-4pm. Hudson Highlands Nature Museum Outdoor Discovery Center. Muser Dr, Cornwall. 534-5506 x204. Boo at the Zoo. Come to the Bear Den at 10:30 to make spooky snacks for the black bears plus family-friendly fun and activities. 10:30am-3pm. Trailside Museums and Zoo. Bear Mountain State Park, Bear Mountain. 786-2701. Decorate a (Little!) Pumpkin. Children will enjoy the traditional Halloween fun of decorating their own pumpkin! Must register. 10:30am. Fri- da's Bakery & Cafe . 26 Main St, Milton. 795-5550. Halloween Fun Festival at DuBois Farms. Ap- ples and pumpkins to pick, and kids in costume get a treat! 10am-5pm. DuBois Farms U-Pick. 209 Perkinsville Rd, Highland. 795-4037. Haunted Hayrides. Take a hayride through the historic grounds of the Farmers Museum. 7-10pm. Orange County Farmers Museum. 850 State Rte 17K, Montgomery. 457-2959. 30: Sunday Halloween Parade at Fishkill Farms. Get your costumes ready for the Halloween Parade for kids and pumpkin picking! 9am-6pm. Fishkill Farms. 9 Fishkill Farm Rd, Hopewell Junction. 897-4377. Halloween Parade. Candy will be given out to the kids. 12:30pm. Village of Monroe. 7 Stage Rd, Monroe. 782-8341. Kingston Model Train and Hobby Railroad Show. Marvel at unique modular operations, Lego© cities and a large garden-scale railroad train display. 10am-4pm. Murphy Midtown Recre- ation Center. 467 Bdwy, Kingston. 616-0931. 31: Monday Lapsit. Books, music, simple action rhymes, and playtime with developmentally appropriate toys, as well as tips on how to create a "bright start" for future learning. Registration required. 9:30-10am. Newburgh Free Library. 124 Grand St, Newburgh. 563-3601. Trick-or-Treat on Huguenot Street. 4-6pm. Historic Huguenot Street. 81 Huguenot St, New Paltz. 255-1660. By HEIDI SMITH LUEDTKE M y daughter believes zom- bies live in our attic and my son swears he's seen a green ghost in my bedroom. I tell them, "Monsters are just pre- tend," but neither child believes me. They're convinced that danger lurks in the darkness. Where fears come from Kids' fears are as unique as their personalities. Some kids are afraid of animals and insects (dogs, snakes, spiders), characters in costumes (beware Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny), and things that go bump in the night. Others fear loud noises or believe they'll be sucked down the toilet when it flushes. Even kids who don't believe in the boogeyman may fret about schoolyard bullies. Psychologists suggest that some kids just have a natural propensi- ty for it while other fears grow in response to trauma. For example, a child may start to fear bees after being stung or seeing a classmate get stung on the playground. A little information can be dangerous: Kids who learn about killer bees may believe backyard bumblebees are mini-mercenaries. "Kids look to parents for cues about whether a situation is safe," says Tamar Chansky, PhD, author of Freeing Your Child from Anxiety. "Parents need to be mindful of the signals they send so they don't send fearful messages about objects or situations that are basically safe, or can be managed," she says. Fight fears together Dismissing kids' concerns may not be the answer as it can actually feed fears instead of alleviating them. The best approach is actually prob- lem-solving, which could include any or all of the following: Identify the issue. When your child comes to you for help with a fear, questions like "Why are you afraid of this spider?" and "Have you been hurt by a spider in the past?" encourage your child define her fear more clearly. Once she's defined her fear, she can start to question its legitimacy. Tackle scary with silly. Have your child draw a picture of the thing that scares her. Then, do a goofy makeover. The hairy monster in your daughter's closet will look a lot less frightening wearing a ballet tutu and hair curlers. Coach your child to imagine the monster slipping on a banana peel or falling off a cliff. If ghosts won't go If your child's fears keep her from enjoying everyday activities at home and at school, reach out to your pediatrician or school psychologist. A professional fear-buster can help your child say "Boo!" to ghosts and other childhood anxieties. Heidi Smith Luedtke, Ph.D., is a personality psychologist and mom. She is the author of Detachment Par- enting: 33 Ways to Keep Your Cool When Kids Melt Down. Say goodbye to ghosts (and other childhood fears)

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