Hudson Valley Parent

HVP November 2017

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Page 20 of 43 n Hudson Valley Parent 21 1. Proactively hope for the best, but plan for the worst. Long before we learned Lori was sick, she and I talked about "what if's." We considered whole life insurance and graduate school, both of which are costly. We chose the latter believing education would benefit us and our children in any case. If the two of us lived long lives, M.B.A.'s would increase our earning power both in the short term and the long term. If something happened to one of us, then that degree would help to make either one of us more employable and give us a better chance to make sound business decisions in the context of partner-less parenting. 2. Do what you can. Lori's wake was held at Baue Funeral Home at St. Charles Memorial Gardens in Missouri. My dad's older first cousin, Bobby Wade, arrived to pay his respect. Bobby was in poor health and physically unable to wait in the greeting line. So, when I had a minute, I went out to see Bobby in the foyer. He un- derstood I only had a few moments, so he got right down to it. He said, "You're not the first man to lose his wife. Don't feel sorry for yourself. You will be overwhelmed. There will be dozens of things that need to get done on any given day. Do what you can and don't feel bad about what you can't." 3. Grieve in your own way. This isn't the first time I've referred to my friend, Steve White, who had lost his wife suddenly a couple of years before I lost mine. "Whitey" said to me, "Most folks will have your best interest at heart, not many people understand what you're dealing with. Few will be able to provide perspective or practical help. Remember this; there is no wrong way to grieve." 4. Buy a multi-family home. A single-family home is a huge expense and a drain on the family finances. A multi-family investment property is likely to increase in value and provide some passive income. It is a lifestyle choice, but given your circumstances, if possible, invest in a multi-family property, move in, and rent the other space to defray the mortgage, taxes and insurance. 5. Start a small business. Obtain a DBA, incorporate or form a limited liability corporation. Keep a record of your sales and expenses. In just about all cases, owning and operating a small business can be done simul- taneously to a full-time job. Not only can a small business both provide an income and have an intrinsic value, but it will also allow you to dictate your hours, keep you close to home and to your children and provide you with the ability to consider some of your other items as business expenses. • Treating infants through teens, and children with special needs • Braces, Invisalign, Orthodontic appliances • Sedation with Nitrous Oxide • Fun & Friendly Atmosphere • Most insurances accepted • Spanish speaking doctor and staff Dr. Jeffrey J. Kim, DDS Orthodontist Dr. Agnes Barbagallo, DDS Pedodontist Providing Excellent, Comprehensive Orthodontic and Pediatric Dental Care 400 Midway Park Drive, Middletown • 845-344-4336 Favorite HUDSON VALLEY PARENT Healthcare Professionals & 2016 (Continued on Page 22)

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