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30 Hudson Valley Parent n April 2018 there are so many potential intervening variables - family, friends, neighborhood, culture, socio-economic strata, etc.," says Dr. Paul Schwartz, professor of psychology and the director of the Center for Adolescent Research and Development at Mount St. Mary's College in Newburgh. "We can go on and on and on about how we become the people we are. The best we can do is generalize." While my family agrees that Nicole is the epitome of the oldest child, Travis and Samantha don't think that they are anything like the description of their birth order personality. Travis isn't obstinate, is very calm and requires very little attention. Samantha is my baby girl but she is not desperate for attention which is typical for the youngest. She is extremely independent and is very cautious, not frivolous. By LISA IANNUCCI I have three children. Nicole was born first followed two years later by Travis and then three years later by Samantha. They are all in their early 20's now. If I follow what the experts say about birth order personalities, Nicole should be a leader, Travis should be independent but obstinate and Samantha should be less independent and is more likely to be frivolous. The concept of birth order personality was developed by an Austrian psychiatrist, Alfred Adler, who theorized that what order you were born affected your personality. That, in turn, determined how you handled your life, love and work, among other things. It's not as simple as it sounds. "When you look at human behavior and how we become who we are, We discussed what Dr. Schwartz said about the factors that affect a person's personality. For example, I lost my husband when the kids were younger. Travis became very protective of his sisters and never felt competitive with them. What can birth order predict about personality? In his book, The Birth Order Book," Dr. Kevin Leman writes, "There are standard birth order rules, and there are also exceptions to those rules. Birth order gives you some important clues about your personality, your relationship with friends, co-workers and loved ones, the kind of job you have and how you handle problem solving." Filomena Fanelli has two daughters - one is eleven-years-old and one is six-years-old - and she believes that both of her daughters resemble their birth order traits. "Our firstborn is Is your firstborn a natural leader? How birth order impacts your family Lisa Iannucci's firstborn, Nicole (left), fits her birth order personality. Her other children think that losing their father at a young age has more to do with their personality than their birth order does.