Hudson Valley Parent

HVP August 2019

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14 Hudson Valley Parent n August 2019 all, they couldn't - not with a new baby in the mix. I relished the times when my son and I were able to take twenty minutes or longer to complete a diaper change. There was no stress or urgency because it was just him and I. Any moment could become a teachable moment. Like the time when he was three months old, he noticed the sunlight coming through the window, shining onto his hand and the wall next to him. We were able to stay in that moment together. It truly was amazing. I get sad when I think I may never even have that same opportunity with any other child of mine. By ILANA CHARETTE A t the very end of my son's second birthday party, just after the last guest departed, I fell asleep on the couch at five o'clock in the evening. I took a pregnancy test two days later. Life as I knew it was about to be very different. I was excited, scared and, most notably, distraught about what having a second baby would mean for my son and I. We were crazy about each other. We had inside jokes and fun! I knew things were going to be drastically different with a new baby in the house. I felt myself thinking a lot and asking myself challenging questions. Was I going to be able to love the new baby as much as I love my son? I had found a rhythm juggling full time work, my son, my husband and myself nicely - How in the world was I going to keep my balance? And the hardest of all, Was my son going to know that I love him? Would he know just how much I cherished the precious time we shared when it was just us? This time we had together are years he will never remember, but I will always hold close to my heart. The gentle, sweet, appropriately noisy and quiet times when I was able to meet his needs with intention and quickness. He had been doted on for years and things were simply not going to be able to continue that way - after On August 1, 2018 my husband and I went to the hospital to get induced and we left our son at home with my parents. I remember feeling so sad that this love would change and be different. My son had changed our lives and our daughter was about to do the same all over again. I did not want life to be any different. I had quite enjoyed what was almost three years with my son at that point. They were pure delight and only mildly chaotic. He loved to sleep. I had no idea what my new baby would be like. The unknown is always scarier than any actual reality. Is my heart even big enough to care for another child? Mothers share their concerns as they add more children to their families Ilana Charette (left) enjoyed the relatively chaos free days with just one baby. When she was pregnant a second time, she felt nervous and sad that those days were coming to an end.

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